Cameron Diaz says we should “normalize” separate bedrooms in marriages—and we’re on board

Cameron Diaz has been married to her husband, Benji Madden, for nine years now. Anyone who’s been married for nine years knows that sharing a home (and all your personal space) with one person for that long can be wonderful and beautiful—but it can also get a little old. That’s why, when she made an appearance on Molly Sims and Emese Gormley’s Lipstick on the Rim podcast this week, she made an argument that a lot of married couples may be in favor of: giving each other space in a marriage—literally.

“We should normalize separate bedrooms. I would literally, like, I have my house, you have yours, we have the family house in the middle,” she said after a conversation with the co-hosts about husbands’ loud snoring.

She added, “I will go and sleep in my room, you go sleep in your room. I’m fine.”

But that’s not to say there won’t be any sharing of spaces or intimacy in the relationship. Diaz obviously has a plan. She’s obviously thought this through. She then added, “And we have the bedroom in the middle that we can convene in for, you know, our relations.”

To be honest, this sounds a little too perfect. Like, does Cameron Diaz already do this? And if she does, no shame—we’re on board. I’ve always personally said that I’ve spent far too much time renovating my home to be my perfect oasis that reflects my personal style and taste (dopamine decor, anyone?) and that there’s just no room for a romantic partner to come in and mess this up. The best I can do is offer them the condo across the hall. I’ll even help them decorate it.

All jokes aside, there’s plenty of precedent for Diaz’s comments. While not all couples go so far as to sleep in separate rooms or beds (though no judgment, because good sleep is important and if that’s what you need to do, you do you), the Scandinavian sleep method went viral this year, where couples use separate duvets in order to get better sleep, because let’s face it—sometimes sharing just isn’t caring.