Chris Pratt calls Katherine Schwarzenegger the stricter parent—what it says about parenting styles

Chris Pratt just confirmed what many parents already know: Not every parenting team operates with the same rulebook.

During a recent appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live, Pratt revealed that his wife, Katherine Schwarzenegger, might be the tougher parent when it comes to raising their four kids. “Katherine inherited some of that Austrian toughness,” he joked, referring to her father, Arnold Schwarzenegger. “So maybe in that regard… as a parenting team, she is… more of the authoritarian.”

While Pratt’s comments were lighthearted, they reflect a real challenge many parents face—what happens when two people come into parenthood with different styles of discipline, expectations, and approaches to raising kids?

How upbringing shapes parenting styles

It’s no surprise that the way we were raised impacts how we parent. In Schwarzenegger’s case, growing up with a no-nonsense father like Arnold Schwarzenegger likely influenced her approach to discipline. For Pratt, who has spoken about his own laid-back and comedic approach to life, parenting might look a little different.

But today, many parents are re-evaluating the strict parenting they grew up with. Research has shown that authoritarian parenting (strict rules, little flexibility) can lead to anxiety and lower self-esteem, while permissive parenting (few rules, lots of freedom) can create a lack of boundaries and accountability. The sweet spot? An authoritative approach—one that balances firm expectations with warmth, respect, and open communication.

Related: I don’t want to be a helicopter parent—but parenting today makes it hard to let go

How couples can align on parenting

Disagreements over discipline, schedules, or boundaries don’t have to be a constant battle. The key is finding common ground while respecting each other’s instincts and values. Here’s how:

• Have the parenting conversation early (or now). Even if you’re already deep into parenthood, it’s never too late to ask, What values do we want to instill in our kids? Talk about non-negotiables (like safety and kindness) and areas where you’re open to flexibility.
  
• Understand each other’s triggers. If one parent is hyper-focused on table manners while the other doesn’t mind messy meals, it’s likely a reflection of how they were raised. Identifying these emotional roots can help you both approach discipline more intentionally instead of just defaulting to how things were done in your childhood.
  
• Present a united front. Nothing confuses kids more than one parent enforcing a rule and the other undermining it. Even if you disagree behind the scenes, try to resolve differences privately so your children don’t learn to play one parent against the other.
  
•  Choose your battles. Not every disagreement needs to turn into a full-blown debate. Prioritize the big picture parenting values (safety, respect, kindness) and allow for differences in smaller matters.
  
• Compromise where possible. If one parent leans stricter on bedtime and the other is more flexible, meet in the middle—maybe set a structured bedtime on school nights but allow for looser rules on weekends.

Related: What is FAFO parenting? The viral trend changing how kids learn responsibility

What experts say about balancing parenting styles

Psychologists emphasize that kids thrive on consistency—but that doesn’t mean parents have to be identical in their approach.  

Psychologists emphasize that kids thrive on consistency, but that doesn’t mean parents have to be identical in their approach. The key is balancing warmth and structure so children feel both supported and secure.

“Everyone comes at parenting a little differently based on their own personality, their own, the parenting they received as a child. And also, every child is unique, right? So, we need a parenting framework that works for everyone, regardless of that family—the unique factors in that family,” said Dr. Laura Markham.

In other words, it’s natural for parents to have different instincts. What matters most is creating a shared framework that blends structure and emotional connection.

Related: This video shows how gentle parenting can heal your inner child

“Authoritative parenting is most widely associated with positive outcomes for children because it gives children the boundaries and structure they need to thrive and become good citizens. But [it] also provides the warmth, love, and nurturing needed to learn how to self-regulate themselves, learn pro-social behavior and build positive relationships with others,” said Dr. Crystal Lee.

Instead of debating who’s the stricter parent, couples should focus on how their styles complement each other. If one parent values structure while the other prioritizes flexibility, a middle ground ensures kids experience both guidance and independence.

“We know that problems can’t be solved at the level that they’re created. We know we have to rise up a little higher than that to find the emotional generosity and the connection,” said Dr. Laura Markham.

Rather than getting stuck on who’s right, experts recommend focusing on connection and problem-solving. Parenting isn’t about winning debates—it’s about working together to create a supportive, aligned approach where kids feel both loved and secure.

The bottom line

Every parenting duo has a “stricter” parent and a “softer” one at times—and that’s totally normal. The key is avoiding extremes, staying aligned on core values, and respecting each other’s instincts.

So whether you’re the Schwarzenegger-style tough parent or the laid-back one, the goal isn’t to be the same—it’s to be on the same team.

Sources:

1. Parenting outcomes. Parenting Science. 2024. “Authoritarian parenting outcomes: What happens to the kids?” 
2. How parenting contributes to anxiety in adolescents. Innovations in Clinical Neuroscience. 2023. “Role of Parenting and Psychosocial Correlates Contributing to Social Anxiety in Asian Adolescents: A Systematic Review”