Aunt doesn’t want young niece & nephew at her birthday dinner—and Reddit’s on her side

The topic of kids at big events—weddings, birthdays, etc.—is a hot one, and this viral post in the Reddit AITA forum is no exception. An aunt is asking if she’s wrong for not wanting her young niece and nephew at her birthday dinner because of their poor behavior. And while your knee-jerk reaction might be to take the side of the kids (because don’t all kids behave poorly sometimes?), it’s worth reading her take on the matter.

The aunt and original poster (OP) says her sister Angel abides by “hands-off” parenting that is “entirely permissive” and refuses to discipline her son and daughter, Sofia and Parker. And while OP loves her niece and nephew very much, she doesn’t love her sister’s parenting style and how it affects everyone around them.

“She expects other adults to step in when Sofia and Parker’s behavior is getting out of hand,” OP writes. For this reason, I asked Angel to get a babysitter for Sofia and Parker if she wanted to attend my 27th birthday.”

AITA For posting videos of my niece and nephew misbehaving in response to my sister’s complaints that I did not want them at my birthday dinner?
by u/SofiaNParkersBadAunt in AmItheAsshole

Tbh, it’s not unreasonable to want an adults-only, peaceful dinner for your birthday. Unfortunately, Angel was none-too-pleased about her sister’s wishes and took to social media to air out the dirty laundry, so to speak.

“She went online and made a Facebook post accusing me of hating Sofia and Parker and trying to punish Angel by only inviting our sister Jessica’s kid Megan to my birthday dinner. (Nevermind that Megan is 17 and is practically an adult herself),” OP says.

It should go without saying that a 17-year-old’s behavior is likely a lot different than that of a 10-year-old and 7-year-old who are used to chaos and power rather than structure. OP says a lot of relatives called her out for being an “a-hole” for neglecting to invite her niece and nephew.

In response, OP says she decided to share two videos of Sofia and Parker “misbehaving” on Angel’s post. (The videos OP shared were already shared by Angel herself on her own Facebook account, as well as Megan’s account—they were not private videos from OP’s camera roll.)

“The first video was a recording taken by Megan, where Sofia and Parker were throwing tantrums and yelling at her. Megan was trying to calm Sofia and Parker down while Angel was on her tablet ignoring the situation,” OP explains. “The other video was one that Angel took. Sofia and Parker were yelling, throwing toys at each other, and Parker even called his sister a bad word. Angel was laughing as if it were funny and was again doing nothing to discipline Sofia or Parker.”

After all was said and done and uploaded, Angel didn’t show up to her sister’s birthday dinner at all and OP and Angel’s parents are mad at OP for sharing the videos.

“My parents also said I could have compromised by having a ‘Nobody under 18’ rule for my birthday dinner,” she continues. “Megan would not be able to attend but then Sofia and Parker wouldn’t feel excluded. I do not see how that would be fair to myself or Megan. AITA For not wanting to make compromises for my birthday dinner?”

If you made up your own mind about this debacle already, you’re not alone. Redditors flocked to OP’s post to tell her she’s not wrong for wanting a peaceful dinner—and many brought up good points about her sister Angel as well.

Comment
by u/ResoluteMuse from discussion AITA For posting videos of my niece and nephew misbehaving in response to my sister’s complaints that I did not want them at my birthday dinner?
in AmItheAsshole

Comment
by u/tmommy1118 from discussion AITA For posting videos of my niece and nephew misbehaving in response to my sister’s complaints that I did not want them at my birthday dinner?
in AmItheAsshole

Comment
by u/Ok-Cauliflower-9059 from discussion AITA For posting videos of my niece and nephew misbehaving in response to my sister’s complaints that I did not want them at my birthday dinner?
in AmItheAsshole

Comment
by u/flooperdooper4 from discussion AITA For posting videos of my niece and nephew misbehaving in response to my sister’s complaints that I did not want them at my birthday dinner?
in AmItheAsshole

So what do you think? Is OP a bad aunt or was she in the right?