This mom was shamed for soothing her baby on the exit row of an airplane

An Australian midwife was surprised when a simple video of her soothing her baby on an airplane suddenly took off (pun intended) and went viral.

In the video, Aliza Carr, a midwife based in Sydney, is seen bouncing her 4-month-old daughter in her carrier while on an airplane. She’s standing in the emergency exit row, where there appears to be plenty of room to rock her baby to sleep.

“If you’ve traveled with a little one, how did they go to sleep?” Carr asks in the caption. “I know if my child’s life depended on it, she wouldn’t sleep in the plane bassinet, or even on us — standing, bouncing and aggressively swaying is the only way.” 

Unfortunately for Carr, the video went viral because of all the comments it was receiving. Many people scolded her for rocking her baby in an exit row.

“If I was sitting at that exit row and paid for the extra leg room… I’d be so mad having this happening in front of me the whole flight!” one person said

“5 minutes once in a while maybe. More than that, if I were paying for my exit row seat, and I would have been seething. I would have asked her to leave the area.”

“No. A hard No! You can bounce your sweet babe in the back of the plane. I’d be pissed as passenger that was forced to watch you bounce,” another person added.

“She is actually standing where the flight attendant seat folds down but it would be very distracting to have right in front of you,” read another comment.

“A few minutes of this to calm the baby down is cool, then I’m done, especially if I’m sitting in that row.”

“I feel bad for the other passengers who wanted to sit on the plane in peace.”

While there were certainly many comments filled with judgment, there were also plenty of comments from fellow mothers who were supportive of Carr.

“A lot of people are in here criticizing the woman for “bothering” but I’m sure if it was a man doing the same he would be claimed as the dad of the year,” one woman pointed out.

“To the people who are berating this Mum-do you realise she’s doing this for the sake of the other passengers?” said another. “This is a Mum who doesn’t want passengers to have to listen to her cranky baby for an entire flight; so she bounces and sways to keep her baby settled—for the sake of you.”

“Moms definitely can do nothing right nowadays. Get your baby to sleep while standing up, how annoying for the person sitting in front of you. Breastfeed your baby to sleep without moving from your sit, you get asked to cover yourself and are seen as obscene. Let your baby cry in the bassinet and disturb everyone, what a monster. Why cant we just praise our moms for doing their best to soothe their children. Good job mom for keeping your little one happy.”

Last week, Carr responded to her critics in a separate Instagram post.

“This week, a reel I shared of me quietly bouncing my 4 month old baby in an empty part of a plane (where the flight attendants sit for take off and landing / where people stretch / wait for the bathroom etc.) made news headlines,” Carr began.

“The comments themselves are almost entirely from women, largely mothers, which for me is the worst part,” she continued. “At what point do you forget that you too birthed, bled, leaked and lost yourself in the spiral of Mamahood just trying to do your best? It’s beyond me.” 

In her response post, Carr makes an excellent point about what this kind of shaming and trolling does to new parents.

“It amplifies the revolting notion that children should be seen and not heard. That their well-being doesn’t matter, as along as the comfort of strangers isn’t jeopardized,” Carr writes. Secondly, she added, “It pushes the opinion that a mother responding to her new baby is being manipulated, and is spoiling that baby.”

She also has tips for anyone who sees a mom trying her best while traveling with her infant.

“If you’re on a plane with an exhausted mum—here’s some suggestions: Grab her a drink, ask if you can help in any way, remind her that she’s a bada**.”