Tissues alert: Viral TikTok reminds parents to still cuddle their older children

There’s nothing quite like newborn and infant cuddles. They feel so soft and squishy, and they smell divine. And I know you smell their head, too. If you don’t, who even are you? That baby head smell is better than new-car smell any day of the week. 

But as they get older, the snuggles and the cuddles sometimes stop, especially for parents who have more children. This mom on TikTok posted a video about remembering to still snuggle your oldest child even though they’re not a baby anymore, and it will have you in tears. 

Kyli is sitting in her car with her 10-month-old baby in their car seat in the backseat and she shares a conversation she had with another mom friend who just had another baby. And at the time, Kyli still just had her one. 

This friend had three kids, with the oldest 7 years old. She told Kyli that she didn’t really like cuddling and kissing and being physically affectionate with her oldest. Because in her mind “they weren’t babies.” 

Kyli explained in the video,  “My friend was like, ‘I still like to kiss and cuddle my younger two because I still think of them as babies.’” 

And at first, Kyli thought she’d never do that because her daughter was still a “baby” at 2 years old.

But like most things we say “we’ll never do as parents,” Kyli ended up doing the same thing with her daughter without even meaning to, as she confesses this in the video.

She says that her oldest told her she didn’t like “wet kisses” anymore, so Kyli honored her daughter’s bodily autonomy, and stopped. But then she says she realized that stopped doing all the other physically affectionate things with her, e.g., the hugging, the snuggling, cuddling, and tickling. But she still did these things with her 10-month-old baby.

Kyli said that she started looking at old videos of her oldest daughter from when she was 10 months old, and she realized that she really missed that daughter. And because she was her first kid, Kyli said she was an anxious mom and did not thoroughly enjoy the baby stages as much as she should have. She focused on hitting milestones and sort of hurried her along to grow up.

And I think many of us first-time parents do that with our first children for sure. 

But with Kyli’s second child, she said she “savors” him quite a bit, with the snuggling, cuddling, nuzzling, and appreciating the “baby-ness.” 

So she went into her daughter’s room to cuddle her and snuggle with her, and while rubbing her hair she told her, “You’re my baby.” And it was awesome for both of them.

“It was so lovely,” Kyli said. 

View your oldest child like they’re still babies, she said in the video.

So cuddle your oldest or older child tonight. Act like they’re still babies and re-do the savoring and the cuddling you were too anxious to enjoy when they were infants. 

They do grow up really fast, and you’ll both be glad you did.