All about ‘almond moms’ and the TikTok trend for millennials who had them

You know those moments when you’re scrolling through your FYP on TikTok, and you think to yourself, “Wow, so this is something A LOT of us can relate to?” It happens more often than you’d expect, right? This is probably why the “almond mom” trend has been exploding on TikTok lately.

While many millennial women endured childhoods where we watched our mothers count Weight Watchers points, turn down bread at restaurants because they were “being good,” and like found things like Snackwell’s or Lean Cuisines in the kitchen regularly, the term “almond mom” is the all-encompassing way to identify these types of moms.

Related: Diet culture deeply impacts kids of all ages: 5 ways parents can break the cycle

Moms who are susceptible to diet culture and perpetuating harmful eating habits is nothing new, unfortunately, the term “almond mom” is relatively new. It began when a video compilation of old clips from “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” began circulating on TikTok, featuring Yolanda Hadid obsessively chiding her daughter, model Gigi, about her eating habits.

In one of the clips, Gigi talks to her mom about how her dieting is impacting her health.

“I’m feeling really weak. I had, like, half an almond,” Gigi, distraught, confides to her mom.

“Have a couple of almonds, and chew them really well,” Yolanda says.

And BAM, “#AlmondMom” began its life on the app. Women of all ages—many of them millennials—began sharing their own stories about their own Yolandas. Er, almond moms. Some videos feature funny and relatable skits where they impersonate their moms.

Some center on really heartbreaking stories about how their moms directly contributed to a lifetime of disordered eating for their daughters all due to the never-ending quest to be thin. Others featured some Almond Moms themselves, still abiding by the rule of barely eating because “nothing tastes as good as being skinny feels.”

In another scene from RHOBH, Yolanda makes sure Gigi doesn’t even enjoy a full slice of her own birthday cake.

“You can have one night of being bad, right,” she says about Gigi having ONE SINGULAR BITE OF CAKE. “Then you gotta get back on your diet, though. Because, you know, in Paris and Milan they like the girls just a tad on the skinny side.”

Yolanda herself responded to the trend in a good-natured way, seemingly owning (though not apologizing for) her Almond Mom persona.

Because our moms grew up as victims of diet culture thanks to society and their own moms, millennials are tasked with not only dealing with our almond moms in their current state, but also de-programming the harmful diet culture tactics that were ingrained in us our entire lives so we don’t damage our own kids in the same way.

Dr. Karla Lester, a pediatrician and child obesity expert, explains what’s at the root of this harmful thinking to TODAY Parents:

”The almond mom phenomenon is rooted in fatphobia and internalized bias. She projects her own fears onto her children and in doing so, teaches them that she doesn’t accept them unless they’re at a weight that may be unattainable.” 

Related: 7 ways to help your kids form a healthy relationship with food

In the ’90s, we watched Oprah bring out a wagon of fat to show how much weight she had lost as an entire in-studio and global audience ooh-ed and ahh-ed, applauding her for it.

In the early 2000s, we watched Jessica Simpson get eviscerated for wearing a pair of high-waisted “mom jeans.” We saw Paris Hilton get photographed wearing the lowest-cut jeans in existence, with her hip bones jutting out, and we were taught that was the “ideal.”

We were told, time and time again by our Almond Moms, that we weren’t hungry, we were “bored.” A glass of water was the solution, not food! All because our Almond Moms were told, “A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips” by their own moms.

We’re breaking the cycle, and this TikTok trend is one way a lot of us are processing the harm—through dark humor and sharing a collective experience. Hopefully seeing these videos helps heal the mother wound that inspired them.

Until then, if you’re hungry, you’re hungry. You’re not bored. GO EAT. Xo.