Megan Fox on baby #4—and what it’s really like to raise a big family

As a mom of five kids (ages 12, 10, 8, 5, and almost 2), I’ve learned a thing or two about welcoming a new baby into a big family. And as my family has grown, so have my personal lessons on what it means to manage a large, growing family.

So when actress Megan Fox (expecting a child with fiancé Machine Gun Kelly) shared her plans for preparing for baby #4, her comments struck a chord with me. While her family keeps growing and evolving, she already knows what it takes to thrive in motherhood:

“With this being child #4, I already have learned all the tricks to make my body feel well physically and mentally,” Fox told PEOPLE. “I am sleeping and exercising and sticking to my healthy diet and lifestyle, as always.”

Adding a fourth (or fifth, or sixth) baby isn’t just “one more.” It changes your family dynamics, stretches your time, and shifts your perspective on motherhood in ways you might not expect.

Here’s what no one tells you about preparing for and welcoming another little one into a big family.

1. Your confidence grows, but so does the chaos

By the time baby #4 arrives, you know what you’re doing. You’ve got the swaddling, sleep routines, and snack schedules down. Your anxiety is (usually) lower; you are used to the sleepless nights, and you already know how to install a car seat like a pro.

But at the same time, life with multiple kids doesn’t give you much time to savor that confidence. School drop-offs, soccer practices, and snack refills don’t stop for nap time. You trust yourself more as a mom, but your to-do list is longer than ever.

Related: Motherhood is: Being sleep-deprived and still getting it done

2. Life is easier—in some ways

Big families are hard, but not in the way you might think. When your kids are older, they’re more independent. They pack their own lunches, help with chores, and even pitch in with the baby. Watching my older kids help their younger siblings has made this stage of motherhood feel more manageable than when I had three little ones underfoot who needed me for everything. So even though I have a bigger family, I do have more hands on deck to make it manageable.

3. The magic of sibling love

One of the most heartwarming parts of a big family is watching your older kids bond with their new sibling. Seeing them take on the role of protector, entertainer, and even diaper-changer is nothing short of magical. It’s a bonus joy that makes the sleepless nights feel worth it.

4. You wish you could mother yourself

With every baby, I’ve gained wisdom. I’ve learned to trust my instincts, let go of perfection, and tune out the noise of what others think I “should” be doing. I often wish I could go back to my first-time-mom self and share this hard-earned wisdom. I’d tell her to stop worrying so much and remind her she’s doing a great job. But I wouldn’t have all this wisdom without having gone through that hard stuff early in my journey. I guess that’s just how time works. 

5. The stuff shrinks, but the love grows

By baby #4, you know that you don’t need all the gear. My diaper bag days are over—I carry a diaper and wipes in my purse, and that’s it. The more kids I’ve had, the more I’ve realized I need less stuff. What does grow, though, is the love. I love the saying, “If you think my hands are full, you should see my heart.”

Related: Things not to say to moms of a big family

6. You build the muscles of motherhood

Motherhood is the ultimate endurance sport. With five kids, I’ve developed serious stamina—not just physically but emotionally. I know how to pivot, handle chaos, and keep moving forward with grace (most of the time). These are the muscles of motherhood that grow stronger with every baby.

7. A family that runs on love (and inside jokes)

Big families develop their own rhythm. Our house is filled with inside jokes, sibling dynamics, and traditions that make life richer and more connected. It’s not perfect, but it’s ours, and I wouldn’t trade the beautiful mess for anything.

The richness of a big family

Welcoming a new baby into a big family is a unique and rewarding experience. It’s not always easy, but the love multiplies, not divides. To Megan Fox, and every mom preparing for baby #4 (or beyond): you’ve got this. Your family is about to grow in love, laughter, and joy—and it’s worth every challenge.