To the mama who is the last person on her ‘to-do’ list

All of us mamas are in constant motion, both physically and mentally. Whether it’s tending to our littles, our spouses, our friends and family—we, more often than not, end up LAST on our own to-do lists.

My own daily tasks and weekly lists feel endless and usually as if no real progress is happening. Seriously, does one ever actually feel on top of the never-ending laundry!?

Juggling all the balls for everyone in my life seems to push my own personal to-do’s further and further down my list. Because I’ve got to keep the balls in the air.

The kids are all up-to-date on their flu shots, vaccinations and well-visits.

But….I have still yet to get my own flu shot. I am months overdue for my annual OBGYN visit and scheduling that half-yearly dental cleaning has been on my to-do list for a month now. ?

The kids get their hair cut every 8-10 weeks at the cutest kid salon.

But…my gray roots are so out of control, there is no good way to even hide them anymore. I have to find time to schedule with my hair stylist and somehow also coordinate a babysitter at the same time! Sometimes it feels like it’s not even worth it.

The kids have all their new seasonal gear from boots, snow pants, matching gloves, hat and scarf.

But…I just realized my Uggs have a hole in the toe and my matching hat and glove set from last year are nowhere to be found, so it’s mismatched for me.

All the constant school paperwork is completed and every new seasonal activity, music class and sport has been registered for my children.

But…those yoga and knitting classes I’ve been meaning to sign up for years, still remain unsigned up for.

I encourage my husband to schedule times to workout on weekends and have a few hours to recharge from his hectic work week.

But…as a stay-at-home mom, there is no scheduled break from the daily work of being a mom or real difference between the week and weekend.

My littles get nightly spa-like treatment with bubble baths, nail trimming and lotion to keep their skin from getting dry.

But…I still have two unused massage gift certificates because I haven’t found time to schedule an appointment and actually take the time to relax. And don’t even look at my chipped and faded pedicure, please. ?

The way I constantly land at the bottom of my own list, like so many other mothers do, is embarrassing. How is it that the last person to get any much-needed attention, is the one who needs it the most?

This isn’t anybody’s fault but my own. Even though I am fully aware I need to be better about carving out time for myself and actually making that a priority, it’s easier said than done.

So I’m determined that 2018 is going to be different. I am putting myself at the top of the list and making time for myself in the New Year. And I refuse to feel badly or selfish about doing it. I need to make “time for me” a priority in my family’s life and a part of our regular routine.

This year, I vow to schedule a babysitter to help for a few hours a week so I can actually schedule those doctors visits—or even better, use those massage gift certificates. This year, I vow to get my hair done every three months and then make sure I schedule my next appointment before I leave the salon—that way I know I have another appointment coming up and don’t drown in gray hairs.

This year, I vow to plan a mom-away day once in awhile, where I can literally do whatever my heart desires—get a mani-pedi, go shopping, meet my sister for lunch or take a long hike. This year, I vow to not only encourage my husband to take some time for himself on the weekend, but I’ll also encourage myself. If my husband gets a couple of hours on Saturday, I’ll get a couple of hours on Sunday.

This year, I vow to make time each week to workout—and to not feel guilty about it, especially because a little sweat and exercise will only give me more energy.

This year, I vow to spend more time with my girlfriends—to meet for dinner or drinks one night a month and have it become a regular thing.

This year, I vow to give myself some spa-like treatment at home—whether it’s a new body lotion or decadent bubble bath.

This year, I vow to not feel guilty about occasionally updating my own wardrobe—because sometimes a new top or pair of jeans can really give a mama some pep in her step.

This year, I vow to push myself to try something new—whether it’s those knitting classes or the hot yoga class I’ve been too nervous to try.

A rejuvenated, refreshed and clear-minded version of myself will re-energize my mothering and help me feel more like the person I want to be.

I feel confident that tending to myself with more care, with actually make me a better mother. Such a simple idea.

And honestly, I know that once I am back on the top of the list, it will only benefit our entire family.