Home / Parenting To the mama doing SO much she feels like she’s failing at everything—I see you You show up. EVERY. DAY. No one else can do a better job at providing motherly love than you. By Tunde Wackman September 22, 2017 Rectangle Mama, parenting can seem like a race toward endless perfection. You put a lot of pressure on yourself to do it all—be ever-present for your children while also working and aspiring to live your best life. Sometimes, though, you crack under all that pressure and feel like you’re failing at everything. There are days when you feel like you’re a hamster on a wheel. You’re juggling dozens of balls in the air (without dropping a single one! Or at least, not the important ones…) while running—faster and faster. Though you are doing a million things, it doesn’t feel like you’re doing any one thing well. Remember you’re doing the best you can in a difficult stage of your life. There are so many demands on you and your time. You know the hustle will be worth it in the end, but that doesn’t make all the commitments you’re handling any easier. To the mamas trying to pull off a carefully crafted balancing act and struggling—I see you. To the mom who missed her child’s field trip because of work—I know the guilt you’re feeling is soul crushing. My heart aches for you. To the mom trying to wrap up work calls while getting the kids ready for soccer and planning dinner in her head—I see you. To the mom attempting to get dressed up for a well-deserved night out while also trying to get the kids to bed and find a time to reschedule that doctor’s appointment for tomorrow—I know how stressful this feels. To the mom who just couldn’t hold it together anymore and had a meltdown right alongside her toddler only to feel the immense guilt immediately afterward—I see you. To the mom who had to leave in the middle of an important meeting with senior leadership because the school nurse called—I know your internal struggle. To the mom who went grocery shopping (with kids in tow, bickering and pulling things off the shelves) only to forget the ONE thing she needed the most on her list—I see you. To the mom whose husband yearns for a date night, but all she wants to do is catch up on elusive sleep—I see you. Some days, you may feel like that hamster on a wheel never getting ahead. But the truth is, you’re doing SO MUCH—and doing them well. You show up. EVERY. DAY. You are present and you shower your kids with love (even when you are super stressed and they are in the middle of the monster of all tantrums). No one else can do a better job at providing motherly love than you. You feed and nourish your family—day after day. So what if you sometimes have to outsource this task? Your kids still have happy bellies. You’re involved in your kids’ lives. You volunteer at school events, bake cookies (or buy them—totally fine) for fundraisers, host play dates and know your kids’ friends’ (and their parents’) names. Your children feel most comfortable with you. They look to you as the keeper of their secrets, as referee for their most recent dramas or just as a listener to those ‘best day ever’ (or ‘worst day ever’) stories. You’re nurturing a bond so strong, super glue has nothing on you. You’re a role model for true beauty—the kind that radiates from within. You teach your daughter (or son) that being ‘pretty’ has nothing to do with being beautiful. You are raising them to be kind, compassionate, resilient, hard-working and well-rounded human beings. Your husband WANTS to be with you. “We don’t go out enough” is his way of saying he loves you and misses spending time with you. Revel in how desirable you are. Not everyone will admit to it, but you’re definitely not alone in feeling like a failure at times. But just when you think all is lost, you’re going to see that you’re not. You’ll feel it in that hug you receive after the tantrum is over. You’ll hear it in the “I love you” said when you put your little one to bed. You’ll see it in the grateful beaming smile your child gives you when she learns she can have cereal for dinner. Mama, it’s all worth it. Related Stories Parenting There’s no right way to mom—let’s stop the shame Safety Recall alert: Over 85,000 Melii Baby silicone spoons pulled due to choking hazard Car Seat Safety 600,000+ Nuna RAVA car seats recalled over harness safety concerns The latest Family Finances & Budgeting ‘We’re working for daycare’: How American individualism and economic forces are breaking families News ‘My salary doesn’t cover daycare’: A mom’s viral TikTok highlights the need to rethink childcare costs Work & Motherhood Amy Adams opens up about crying in closets and the pressure to be ‘good at everything’ as a new mom Career & Money 42% of women are less likely to start a business after having kids—here’s why that needs to change