To my husband: When motherhood gets tough, you make it easier

To my husband,

Thank you. Because most times, all other words fail, and those two just about sum it up. And even though I still don’t feel like they say enough, I just want you to know that I deeply appreciate you. Motherhood—and parenthood in general—is not exempt of its difficulties. But when it gets heavy, you make it a lighter load to carry. 

I created life with you. Perhaps, in this instance, I have known no greater love. I couldn’t do this parenting thing without you, and as much as I attempt to let you know this daily, I don’t believe I let you know as often as I could. And so here I am, saying it again. I need you. Because the truth is, parenting gets hard sometimes. Motherhood gets hard sometimes.

When the day’s end comes and I am left a crying, overwhelmed mess, you pick me up. Selflessly. Even after a 12-hour workday and a load of other meetings and responsibilities that call for your attention.

Parenting has been a language we have both had to learn.

When motherhood gets tough, you make it easier. 

You carried me while I carried our son. You pushed with me as I delivered him into this world. And now you journey with me as we learn the ins and outs of parenting together. 

In the first few weeks of postpartum, through sleepless nights and our world becoming something that it had never been before, you were patient with me. Through a difficult breastfeeding experience, through mood swings and raging hormones, and even through arguments and disagreements, you were forbearing and forgiving. You were understanding and quick to make things right again.

After experiencing a body that had swelled and stretched and changed so much, you remained a constant symbol and reminder of the beauty that it held, even when I could not love what it had become.

Parenting has been a language we have both had to learn, and while the road has not been easy, the late nights have brought us closer than we have ever been. We’ve learned to be more patient with each other, more kind to one another and even give each other the space to parent differently.

You selflessly step in when I need you, without me even having to ask. Keeping the household clean and in order, taking care of dinner and laundry while I’m tending to our child—nothing goes unseen or unappreciated.

The way that you nurture and tend to me has poured into our child tenfold. Witnessing you be a father brings a joy that is immeasurable. 

Where I am weak, your strength overflows. When it rains, we wait for the sun to shine again—together.

I know that most times I am consumed by tending to our little one while you are faced with long workdays. In these times, I am our child’s safe haven, but at the end of each day, you are mine. My solace. My peace. My fresh wind.

When I look into our child’s eyes, I am reminded of yours. When I hold him in my arms, I am reminded of the love that created him. When my head is against your chest and the slow rise of it brings me peace, I can only imagine the safety our son feels when he is against mine. You soften my world, and my heart. Every moment leads me back to you. And so every chance I get, I want to let you know that I appreciate you. 

Through the burden that motherhood can often be, you take the load and carry it with me. Where I am weak, your strength overflows. When it rains, we wait for the sun to shine again—together. You help to balance me out, and I do the same for you.

I hope that our child sees our relationship and understands true love, devotion and partnership. Your commitment to our family and your emotional support, your willingness to have those hard conversations and still be gentle all help to make our marriage that much stronger.

I appreciate you for your sacrifices, seen and unseen. I am in awe of the father, husband and man that you are. So from the bottom of my heart—though these words may not say enough—thank you.

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