Home / Life / Motherly Stories I’m biracial and raising a biracial son: Here’s what I hope for his future Phylicia Teymer "As I reflect on my personal perspective of growing up biracial, here are three things I hope for my biracial son and the many multiracial children in the world." By Phylicia I. Teymer February 22, 2023 Phylicia Teymer Rectangle It’s hard to believe less than 60 years ago it was illegal to interracially marry in the United States. Despite the 1967 Supreme Court decision, Loving v. Virginia, which declared state anti-miscegenation laws unconstitutional, it’s only been 23 years since the last U.S. state, Alabama, repealed its laws. I am biracial, considerably multiracial if my 23andMe ancestry report has a say. I am a blend of heritages, cultures, and histories—largely French, German, Nigerian, Ghanaian, British, and Irish, among others. Yet, in a world that’s quick to categorize and create social constructs, I am Black and White. Related: What I wish people understood about raising biracial children While I’ve lived in various places such as Texas and Georgia, I grew up and formed my initial views of the world as a biracial girl from very humble beginnings in the eighth largest city of Iowa, namely, Waterloo. Similar to my parents, I married interracially and several years later, we were blessed with a bright, curious and vibrant son who is now a charming toddler. The birth of our son has heightened my awareness of what it means to be multiracial. As I reflect on my personal perspective of growing up biracial, here are three things I hope for my biracial son and the many multiracial children in the world. What I want my biracial son to know 1. Embrace your full and authentic self I encourage you to give yourself permission to embrace ALL OF YOU. To my son with his sandy blonde soft curls, “like Dad” skin, bright smile and adventurous, yet shy spirit, you don’t have to pick a side, even if society tries to put you in one. 2. Research, acknowledge and respect your blended heritages, cultures and history Don’t leave your history, heritages or cultures in the dark and don’t rely only on school to teach you the full context. For our son, I hope we can teach you all we know and have experienced, and that you seek out, explore and embrace your roots as you grow up. You may not like everything you find like the history of slavery and systemic racism, but you should know it. Related: As a mother of biracial children, I get asked the same questions over and over again 3. Hold space for difficult conversations and perspectives Somewhere in life, you may be confronted with a situation where you’re treated differently based on your complexion or heritage. And, you’ll need to learn to process emotions while remaining calm, determine if it’s worth addressing, and if so, hold space to hear the opposing perspective, too. It can be difficult, but it’s worth learning how to address, consider perspectives, make peace and/or move on. To my dear son and the many multiracial children (and their parents), while there’s still work to be done, and much to celebrate, I wish you an all-encompassing authentic and fulfilled life with no limitations. This story is a part of The Motherly Collective contributor network where we showcase the stories, experiences and advice from brands, writers and experts who want to share their perspective with our community. We believe that there is no single story of motherhood, and that every mother's journey is unique. By amplifying each mother's experience and offering expert-driven content, we can support, inform and inspire each other on this incredible journey. If you're interested in contributing to The Motherly Collective please click here. The latest Halloween Boo Baskets: The Halloween tradition I surprisingly don’t hate Halloween Halloween can be terrifying for kids with sensory processing disorder Viral & Trending Mom goes viral for complaining about her neighborhood’s scary Halloween decorations Holidays The best advent calendars for adults–because yes, we deserve daily treats, too