Even 5 minutes of self-care can make you a better mother

You know those goddess women? The ones that exude positivity and create calm everywhere they go?

Latham Thomas, founder of Mama Glow, is one of those women.

Mama Glow is a holistic lifestyle hub for women to explore their creative edge through well-being and self care. Living in New York alongside her son Fulano, and their turtle Climby, Latham is fiercely focused on creating fabulous, abundant pregnancies, births, and postpartum experiences that refine and shape mothers into the best version of themselves.

We talked to Latham as part of Motherly’s #Momboss series about the powerful and inspiring women changing our world.

She knows how motherhood changes women, and the struggle we find within our postpartum selves to find balance while retaining our sense of self.

To that end, she’s sharing her 5 ways to find equilibrium in your post-baby life—

Latham Thomas: “Navigating new motherhood doesn’t come easy, but remember, you’re learning as you go. Parenting can make everything seem upside-down, but you can find your way to what I call “dynamic equilibrium,” which is all about balance in motion.

It’s not about trying to seek balance, because life is constantly in motion. Rather, it’s about creating practices that help you become more in tune to your needs, your baby’s needs, and the needs of your partner, while respecting the rhythmic cycles within.”

1. Establish a glow time practice

This is a sacred act of self care.

Even if it’s five minutes to yourself in peace and quiet: take a shower or hot salt soak, get a foot rub, take a stroll outside for fresh air, practice some yogic breathing and tune inward, turn on some Beyoncé and dance, or read a good book.

Whatever is going to give you the needed respite you so need. This is just a way to charge your batteries, and make sure there is enough of your energy to go around.

2. Stop multi-tasking + try uni-tasking

Rather than drive yourself nuts trying to complete a ton of tasks at once, try doing just one thing at a time from start to finish. Once complete you can move on to the next task. Remember, give yourself more time than you normally would to complete, so you don’t feel unnecessary pressure.

Delegate tasks to people who can help you get things done and kick back and relax a bit, you just had a baby after all!

3. Take naps

Kids do it for a reason. Sleep is therapeutic and necessary. If you aren’t getting the best sleep set aside some time for naps. Even if you don’t ultimately fall asleep, it’s just a time to “power down” and zen out.

Also if you’re really sleep deprived you can try leg drain, placing your legs up the wall while lying on your back, hanging out there for 20 minutes helps to reset the circadian rhythm and is equivalent to taking a two hour nap.

4. Move your body

A photo posted by Latham Thomas (@glowmaven) on Nov 5, 2016 at 5:47am PDTAfter the baby’s arrival, your body feels exhausted.

While you recover, there are small exercises that you can do to get things back in integration. But don’t force any major exercise within the first six weeks of delivery. Take your time. There’s no rush to get back “to normal.”

Once you accept that time works differently when you have a newborn and learn to integrate your time with your new life, you can incorporate exercise into your day wherever it fits- but mornings are a good idea because it sets the tone for your day and helps to boost your mood. Yoga is excellent and helps to protect the joints, build surrounding muscles, and rehabilitate the core and pelvic floor. If you can make it out the house one time, to a yoga or pilates class, great! If the thought of putting on “real clothes” gives you anxiety, then try workouts online.

5. Define your sister circle and identify support systems

 

Glow Moment- Our speech coach @theGinaBarnett, Geneva Reed- Veal, the incredible mother of Sandra Bland 🙏🏽and badass @LeahDaughtry CEO of Democratic National Convention. #glowmoment #women #powerhouse #inspiration #theround #unbuntu
A photo posted by Latham Thomas (@glowmaven) on Sep 29, 2016 at 8:53pm PDT

This is critical now.

It’s important to build a strong network of cheerleaders so you don’t feel you are alone. Nothing is sustainable without community, especially motherhood. Surround yourself with people who have the skills and resources to help support you. Make yourself at home with your sister circle. Ask questions of mothers around you, and gather resources.

Choose a mixed group of women, including seasoned mamas and single friends. Variety is key here for a few reasons.

First, veteran moms know exactly how to make themselves useful, are often efficient, and usually know their way around the kitchen, so meals will be taken care of. Your single girlfriends, on the other hand, can run errands, grocery shop, answer phones, help clean, and hold the baby to give you a few minutes to take a shower! Ask one of your closest friends to help coordinate a rotation of women—you don’t want all your helpers at the house at the same time!

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Make yourself a priority during this important time. It’s so easy to put everyone in front of yourself, but if you’ve got no energy left, there’s nothing to give. So nurture your new self mama, and watch a warrior awaken.

And if all that good wisdom wasn’t enough, here’s some more Motherly thoughts from Latham Thomas.

 

Glow Moment- On set… Yellow. Channeling Oshun. Thank you to the magical @AshleylDalton_ for the delicate touch. You are a gem. Thank you all for weighing in on what dress to choose. Ready, set, glow… 🙏🏽 Stay tuned. #glowmoment #Oshun #glowmoment #makeup #zacposen #fashion #style #beauty #centric #setlife #goddess
A photo posted by Latham Thomas (@glowmaven) on Sep 28, 2016 at 4:53pm PDT

More Motherly wisdom from Latham—

How do you make your mornings run smoothly?

Latham Thomas: I ritualize my mornings so they run smoothly. I take my time, I move slowly.

I’m all about waking up with plenty of time before my son rises so I have time for myself to get organized and I can set the tone for my day.

This includes rolling out my mat for meditation and getting into some yoga and even taking a morning bath- which I love! I stay off email and if I get on social media, its to post something I have cued up so I can get off as soon as I post it. I make breakfast for my son and we walk to school together.

But the biggest tip for making mornings run smoothly starts the night before, with getting adequate rest and reading a good book, then getting to bed before 11pm so that I can have the most energy and be ready to meet the day. When I have the occasional late nights and oversleep, I blast music in the morning and dance around to get my blood flowing and get myself on task.

The lifehack or tip that has changed my life. . .

Packing a mobile pantry, or a pantry-on-the-go is one of my lifestyle tips that really helps me get through. I am one of those people who needs to eat small meals every few hours. Living in NYC and having a growing son, I learned to carry a mini-pantry for both of us.

What superpower have you discovered as a mom?

I have incredible intuition so I am very tapped into what is happening around me. I do believe that I deepened my empathy. I can walk into a room and sense that someone was crying in there and I am ready to nurture them as a result. Now with a 13-year-old son who is slowly moving through puberty and seeking a natural and healthy distance as he matures, I can tap into my wisdom when I sense he is having a challenge even if he doesn’t tell me outright.

This quote inspires me. . .

“You can’t knock a woman off a pedestal she built herself.”

My friend Lisa Price, founder of Carol’s Daughter posted this recently and I was so moved by it because each of us is building a queendom and when we realize that we stand tall on the foundation that we’ve built for ourselves, no one or nothing can hold us back.

We have to own our glow power. Rise up, look in the mirror and see what a marvel you truly are.

To me Motherly means…

To be motherly is to finesse in a nurturing way. To touch everyone and everything around you with grace. I know that my work is about nurturing women at whatever life stage they are in, helping them rise to the best iteration of themselves. I know that as a mother I am the crux of community so I am here to help nurture, grow and help heal people and that is the motherly gift.

Haley Campbell is the founder of Beluga Baby and creator of the ultimate bamboo baby carrier. She is a regular contributor to Motherly and is an avid advocate for entrepreneurs, and for the new generation of mothers making the world their own.