Home / Life Don’t let a to-do list stand between you + happiness Joy is often found in the mess. By Krystal Howard Clark July 27, 2017 Rectangle Happiness. It is not alluding you. It just doesn’t look the same to everyone. It isn’t grand, and it isn’t constant. It is a culmination of small moments that come together to settle gently in your heart and your soul. It is definitely not found while standing in a field or laughing as you drink a green smoothie. Happiness is remembering to take care of you; remembering to get your eyebrows waxed, taking a long walk alone, reading or spending five minutes every morning in meditation. Happiness is also found in mess. Those moments when you should be making dinner but instead you sit on the couch and watch Peter Rabbit with your son. You feel it in that moment as you let go of what you “should be doing” and just be. Because, as you settle into that moment, and your son laughs and jumps onto your lap—his hands grubby, knees marked and face needing a wipe—you kiss his head and notice it still smells like baby, three years later. These messy, imperfect moments are happiness. It’s there when you give yourself permission to let go of the need for a Pinterest-worthy mom bun and you don’t push yourself to be the mom creating lunch boxes of homemade, organic everything. It’s OK to be that mom sometimes, when you have the reserves, but she also needs a rest. She needs a break, softness, acceptance and permission to just be. Happiness is in the moment, and to them, we are enough in every moment. We are always enough. Mama, give yourself a break. Just be—and let the happiness creep in. Either we take breaks or we breakdown. Both are necessary and healing to the soul. The latest Life Can men really see the mess? Inside moms’ invisible labor at home Life 7 months pregnant on the campaign trail: How motherhood has changed the way I view politics Style Zooey Deschanel’s tips on how to get holiday party-ready (without putting your finger through your tights while your kids are yelling for dinner) Motherly Stories What is the ‘gratitude trap’? How gratitude can keep us stuck