It’s OK if you don’t love your swimsuit body

Summer is upon us, and while I love most things associated with the season, there’s one thing I can’t get excited about right now. I don’t love what I look like in a bathing suit. 

At the same time, I am incredibly proud and appreciative of my body and what it has done for me. Those might seem like contradictory statements, but the reality is that they can both be true at once. That, as a whole, is the kernel behind the body neutrality movement. 

It’s OK (and normal!) to not love everything about your body all the time. When influencers and celebrities preach body-positivity and proclaim that they love their bodies no matter what it looks like, and that I should, too, it’s suddenly taboo to be honest about how I really feel.

Serena Williams recently posted two super-relatable videos of herself trying on a skirt she bought while she was pregnant with her second daughter Adira. In the first video, she laughs that “Houston, we have a problem” as she tries to pull the skirt up. It’s a goal for her to be able to wear it, but in the second video, it still doesn’t fit.

“Can’t say I’m happy about this,” she says, “but it’s getting there.” She acknowledges the work she’s put in to see the progress she’s made and doesn’t say anything negative about her body. She merely indicates that she’s going to keep chipping away until the skirt fits.

The mentality that Williams shares—and the rise in popularity around the idea of body neutrality—seems much more realistic to me. Body neutrality is based around the idea that it’s possible to accept what your body looks like today and be proud of it, while also acknowledging that there are things that you’d like to change about it.

Body neutrality doesn’t mean that you hate your body. It also doesn’t mean you have to think negatively about your body. It just means that you might sigh a little when you put on your bathing suit because you want it to hang a little differently, but that after that little acknowledgement, you just carry on with your day.

In the past 5 years, my body has gone from my personal peak fitness level right before my wedding to growing and delivering two beautiful baby girls. Things have stretched out and shifted around and I’ve gained some weight, mainly in my stomach and “mom pooch” area. 

When I put on a bathing suit, I can’t hide those areas like I can with one of the sundresses I love or my favorite high-waisted leggings. Everything is out in the open–and right now I don’t love the way my “pooch” is accentuated by my suits’ clingy fabric. 

That’s OK. 

I do love that I’ve gotten a lot stronger in the past year. I’m proud of the progress I’ve seen from being more consistent in the gym. I appreciate that I can easily carry my youngest daughter and our massive pool bag and that I can throw my girls up over my head in the pool. I love that I can squat with them in my arms to grab a loose toy. 

But it still remains that I’d like to look different in my bathing suit. And I think that’s normal; a common struggle that many women have over the relationship with their body.

It’s OK to not love where you are right now, and it’s possible to not love where you are right now but to still love yourself. 

I’m not going to let my own opinion of what I look like in a bathing suit stop me from having a blast this summer. I’m going to continue to celebrate what my body is capable of and I’m going to keep working toward the goal I have in my head.