9 simple strategies for a calm labor & peaceful birth

Have you ever watched a birth scene in a movie or on a TV show? Chances are it was pretty intense and loud, and made you cringe at least once.

As a midwife, I’m here to tell you that birth is just not like that in real life.

Yes, it is intense. But it can be incredibly peaceful, gracefully serene and breathtakingly beautiful at the same time.

Here are some techniques you can use to bring calm into your birthing room, whether you’re having your baby at a hospital, birth center or at home. C-section mamas, look for the asterisks to know which tips work for you, too.

How to stay calm during labor

1. Take a birth class

Knowledge is power. Take a birth class that respects your choices and empowers you to give birth with awareness. You’ll feel calmer if you understand what’s going on, and you’ll know how to make decisions as your birth story unfolds.

We are particularly fond of Motherly’s Becoming Mama™ Online Birth Class, and we’ve designed it for ALL types of birth, so **C-section mamas, we’ve got you covered, too.

2. Play a tune

Has a song ever moved you to tears? Or instantly lifted your mood? That’s because music has a profound effect on our emotional state. Heidi Lengel, a doula, music therapist and owner of Fulheart Family Support in Philadelphia, says:

“Research shows that the effective use of music during labor lowers anxiety and pain perception as well as increases emotional and physical comfort.”

So why not crank your favorite tunes in your labor room?

Check out Motherly’s labor playlist!

**C-section mamas: Ask if you can bring some music into the OR with you. We bet the staff will be on board because, hey, they get to enjoy it too!

3. Smell the roses (or lavender)

Scent has such a powerful connection to our emotions. When we smell something pleasant and soothing, we instinctively close our eyes and take a deep breath. You can harness this when you are in labor. Studies have found that the use of aromatherapy while in labor may help women experience less pain and feel more relaxed. Bonus: It can make your hospital labor room smell less well, hospital-y.

Pack a bottle of essential oil in your labor bag, and put a drop or two on a cotton ball next to you for an instant mood change (our personal favorites are lavender for relaxation and orange for an energy boost).

To learn more about the safety of aromatherapy in pregnancy, check with your provider and read this.

**C-section mamas: Ask if your partner can bring the essential oil cotton ball into the OR with you.

4. Breathe

It sounds simple, but it is oh so important. And easy to forget.

Breathing has both physical and emotional benefits. Your body (especially your uterus) needs oxygen to do all the awesome work it’s up to, and your baby needs oxygen to thrive. When you inhale, think about sending a big dose of power and energy down into your uterus and baby. They’ll thank you for it!

Breathing deeply can also be incredibly therapeutic. It gives you something to focus on during your contractions and will help keep you calm. And at the end of each contraction, take a big, cleansing breath to remind yourself that that contraction is over, and you now have a moment of rest.

When you take these deep breaths, try breathing in through your nose for a count of 5 (or whatever feels comfortable to you), and out through your mouth for the same count.

**C-section mamas: This one’s for you, too!

5. Repeat a mantra

A mantra is a word or short phrase that you repeat over and over, as a tiny (but powerful) meditation or reminder. Using a mantra in birth can help you focus and can instill a real sense of calm as well as confidence. There are no rules when it comes to your mantra. The right one is whatever works best for you. Some examples:

• Breathe in calm, breathe out tension
• My body knows just what to do
• My baby is coming
• I trust myself
• I am safe, my baby is safe
• I let the wave carry me
• I’ve got this

Pro tip: Start practicing now. You want your mantra to feel safe and familiar when you are labor. It will come more naturally and it will be more effective.

**C-section mamas: This one is awesome for you.

6. Lean on your support person

Your support person plays such a huge role in helping you to stay calm during your birth. Their presence alone can be very soothing. But they can also serve as your advocate, helping you communicate your desires with the birth team so you can focus on laboring. Let them know what’s important to you, and include them as you practice your coping skills before you go into labor so that they can work seamlessly with you.

**C-section mamas: Your support person will be in the OR with you and can for sure help you relax. They can talk to you, guide you through a relaxation exercise or simply rub your hair.

7. Move

If I had to pick one thing to focus on in labor, it would be movement. Throughout your labor, your baby is making tiny but very important movements to navigate her way down and out. When you move, you change the space within your body, which gives her the opportunity to do what she needs to do. Therefore, moving results in faster labors and decreased pain.

And it just feels good. Think of a contraction as a wave (many people even call contractions “surges”). If you’re standing in the ocean and a big wave comes, you can stand rigid and try to resist it, but chances are it will knock you down. Or you can let your body go a little limp and move WITH with wave. You’ll still feel it, of course, but instead of falling over, you’ll be carried along gently. Same thing in labor.

8. Hire a doula

A doula is a trained professional who provides consistent non-medical support to you during labor and birth. In other words, while she won’t be making decisions about your plan of care, she knows a ton about birth and will help you cope. Research finds that women who have doulas report more satisfying birth experiences.

We should add that doulas are awesome for both you and your partner. They need a little TLC during birth, too, and a doula can provide support to you both.

**C-section mamas: Some hospitals will allow you to bring both your partner and a doula into the OR with you, so don’t be afraid to ask.

9. Try relaxation & visualization exercises

Guided meditations in the form of a relaxation or visualization exercise are awesome when you are in labor. A relaxation exercise will help you release the tension in each part of your body, while a visualization will allow you to envision peaceful images and settings that help you find your Zen. You can practice these now, and then ask your partner to read them to you while you’re in labor.

**C-section mamas: This can definitely be done in the OR.

To read more from the pros, click here: Labor and birth | Office on Women’s Health (womenshealth.gov)

Recap and More!

‍Pregnancy and childbirth are beautiful and miraculous experiences, but they can also be overwhelming and anxiety-inducing for many expecting mothers. The anticipation of labor can often bring about feelings of fear and stress. However, it is important to remember that you don’t have to go through this journey alone. There are several strategies that can help you have a calm and peaceful labor. In this article, we will explore five effective techniques that can contribute to a relaxed birthing experience.

1. Surround Yourself with a Supportive Team

One of the most crucial factors in having a relaxed labor is being surrounded by people you trust and feel comfortable with. This support can come from your partner, family members, close friends, or a doula. Having someone by your side who understands your needs and can provide emotional and physical support can make a significant difference in your overall labor experience.

While you may not have control over the medical professionals present during your childbirth, you can still bring a support person of your choice. This individual can advocate for your preferences and be a source of comfort throughout the process. The presence of a trusted companion can help alleviate anxiety and create a sense of security during labor.

2. Create a Calming Atmosphere

The environment in which you give birth can greatly impact your state of mind and relaxation. Consider creating a soothing ambiance by controlling factors such as lighting, sound, and scent.

Lighting: Bright lights can be harsh and disruptive during labor. Dimming the lights or using soft, indirect lighting can help create a more serene atmosphere. Battery-operated candles can also provide a gentle, calming glow.

Sound: Music has a powerful effect on our emotions and can help create a tranquil environment. Create a playlist of songs that evoke positive emotions and relaxation for you. Whether it’s calming classical music, nature sounds, or your favorite tunes, having familiar sounds can help you stay focused and calm during contractions.

Scent: Aromatherapy can be a valuable tool for relaxation. Certain scents, like lavender or chamomile, have calming properties. Consider bringing essential oils or scented candles that promote relaxation and comfort. Inhaling these soothing scents can help reduce anxiety and create a more tranquil birthing atmosphere.

3. Practice Relaxation Techniques

Learning and practicing relaxation techniques during pregnancy can significantly contribute to a calm labor experience. These techniques can help you manage pain, reduce anxiety, and stay focused. Here are a few relaxation techniques to consider:

Breathing exercises: Deep, rhythmic breathing can help you relax and manage pain during contractions. Practice different breathing techniques, such as slow breathing, patterned breathing, or guided visualization, to find what works best for you.

Progressive muscle relaxation: This technique involves consciously tensing and then releasing each muscle group in your body. Starting from your toes and working your way up to your head, focus on releasing tension and promoting relaxation.

Meditation and mindfulness: Incorporating meditation and mindfulness practices into your daily routine can help you develop a calm and focused mindset. These practices can promote a sense of inner peace and relaxation, which can be beneficial during labor.

Visualization: Create mental images of peaceful and positive scenes that help you relax. Visualize yourself in a serene setting, such as a beach or a peaceful garden. Engaging your imagination in this way can help distract from pain and induce relaxation.

4. Utilize Heat Therapy

Heat therapy can be a valuable tool for pain relief and relaxation during labor. Warmth has a natural calming effect on our bodies and can help reduce muscle tension and alleviate discomfort. Consider the following heat therapy options:

Warm showers: Taking a warm shower during labor can provide soothing relief and help you relax. The sensation of water cascading over your body can distract from the intensity of contractions and promote relaxation.

Warm compresses: Applying warm compresses to your lower back or abdomen can help relieve pain and tension. This can be particularly beneficial during the active phase of labor when contractions are stronger.

Hot packs or towels: Placing warm packs or towels on areas of discomfort, such as the lower back or abdomen, can provide relief and relaxation. The heat can help increase blood flow, reduce muscle tension, and ease pain.

5. Stay Positive and Informed

Maintaining a positive mindset and being well-informed about the birthing process can greatly contribute to a calm labor experience. Educating yourself about the stages of labor, pain management options, and potential interventions can help you feel more empowered and reduce anxiety.

Attend childbirth classes or workshops that provide information and support for expectant parents. These classes can teach you coping techniques, pain management strategies, and provide an opportunity to connect with other parents-to-be. The more knowledge you have about the birthing process, the more confident and relaxed you are likely to feel.

Surround yourself with positive birth stories and affirmations. Reading or listening to empowering birth experiences can help shift your mindset and alleviate fears. Remember, each labor is unique, and focusing on the positive aspects can help you approach the experience with confidence and calmness.

In conclusion, experiencing a calm and relaxed labor is possible with the right strategies and support. Surrounding yourself with a supportive team, creating a calming atmosphere, practicing relaxation techniques, utilizing heat therapy, and staying positive and informed can all contribute to a peaceful birthing experience. Remember, every woman’s journey is unique, so explore what works best for you and embrace the beauty of bringing new life into the world.

Q&A Section:

Q1: How does the portrayal of birth scenes in movies and TV shows differ from real-life experiences?

A1: Birth scenes in movies and TV shows often depict intense and dramatic situations, which may not accurately reflect the peaceful and serene nature of real-life births. While labor can be intense, it can also be incredibly beautiful and calm.

Q2: What techniques can help expectant mothers stay calm during labor?

A2: Several techniques can help expectant mothers stay calm during labor, including taking a birth class, playing calming music, using aromatherapy, practicing breathing exercises, repeating mantras, leaning on a support person, staying mobile, hiring a doula, and trying relaxation and visualization exercises.

Q3: How can music and aromatherapy contribute to a relaxed birthing experience?

A3: Music has been shown to lower anxiety and pain perception during labor, while certain scents in aromatherapy can promote relaxation and reduce anxiety. Both music and aromatherapy can create a soothing and calming atmosphere in the birthing room.

Q4: What role does a support person play in helping an expectant mother stay calm during labor?

A4: A support person plays a crucial role in helping an expectant mother stay calm during labor by providing emotional and physical support, advocating for her preferences with the birth team, and assisting her with coping techniques. Their presence can create a sense of security and reassurance during the birthing process.

Q5: How can relaxation techniques like breathing exercises and visualization help during labor?

A5: Relaxation techniques like breathing exercises and visualization can help manage pain, reduce anxiety, and promote relaxation during labor. Deep, rhythmic breathing can help distract from contractions and provide a sense of calm, while visualization allows the expectant mother to focus on peaceful mental images, helping to alleviate discomfort.

Q6: What is the importance of staying informed and positive during labor?

A6: Staying informed about the birthing process and maintaining a positive mindset can greatly contribute to a calm labor experience. Knowledge empowers expectant mothers to make informed decisions and reduces anxiety, while positivity can help shift their mindset and alleviate fears, leading to a more relaxed birthing experience.

This piece was originally published on January 27, 2017. It has been updated.