Mom asks the internet if she’s wrong for letting her daughter wear a costume to a costume party

When a 4-year-old little girl’s name is Aurora, it just makes sense that her favorite Disney princess would be Princess Aurora, from Sleeping Beauty. And after scoring an Aurora dress on a family trip to Disneyland, of course she would want to wear it all the time — especially to a Disney princess-themed birthday party thrown by one of her friends from school. But in a viral post from Reddit’s “Am I the A**hole” forum, Aurora’s mom is asking the internet if she’s in the wrong for not making her daughter take off her Princess Aurora costume at a princess costume birthday party, and you’re just going to have to read this one to believe it.

“When we got to the party, the birthday girl came to greet my daughter, and she was also dressed as Princess Aurora. I didn’t know what her costume was going to be prior to the party,” the mom wrote. “I got worried for a second, but the birthday girl was actually really excited. She said that they looked like twins. It was adorable. They ran off to play and I forgot about the costumes for a while.”

So far so good, right?

Mom continued, “About 30 minutes into the party, I was at a table with some of the other moms when the birthday girl’s mother came up to me. She asked if I had brought any spare clothes for Aurora. I said yes (I always bring an extra shirt and shorts for her). She then asked me to change my daughter into the spare clothes and out of her costume.”

AITA for refusing to change my daughter’s clothes at a birthday party?
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The birthday girl’s mom explained that she had hired a photographer for the party, and she didn’t want professional pictures of her daughter playing with a child in the same princess costume. 

“Now, if the birthday girl was the one who had a problem, I might’ve considered changing Aurora into her spare clothes. But no, she was genuinely excited they were dressed the same. It also didn’t feel fair to force my daughter to be the only one without a costume in a party full of children in princess dresses,” Aurora’s mom wrote. “I said no and explained my reasoning to the girl’s mom. She insisted for a few minutes, but I held my ground. Some of the other moms started to back me up, and she eventually got up and left.”

Later that week, though, the moms ran into each other in the school pick-up line, and the drama continued. 

“She accused me of ruining her daughter’s party by allowing Aurora to wear the same costume as her. She told me she doesn’t think she’ll ever be able to look at the pictures without being disgusted by my behavior,” Aurora’s mom wrote. “I thought she was exaggerating, but I’m starting to doubt myself. Our conflict has found its way to the mom group chat we’re both in, and opinions over there are divided. Some think having two girls wear the same costume is no big deal, others think I should have changed my daughter’s clothes.”

Well that’s some unnecessary drama if we’ve ever heard any. After clarifying in the comments that there were many kids at the birthday party who were wearing the same costumes (multiple Elsas, Ariels, and Belles, for example), Aurora’s mom was swiftly voted “NTA” for “Not The A**hole.” But she came back later to post an update to the whole saga.

“On Friday, my husband went to pick up the kids. The parents of one of my son’s friends (who have a younger son in my daughter’s class) asked if he knew about the costume fiasco,” she wrote. “I had told him everything. He said the birthday girl’s mother was being ridiculous, as I had no idea what her daughter’s costume would be. The mom he was talking to asked, ‘Wait, she didn’t know?'”
So moms started calling Aurora’s mom, and she started sharing her side, only to find out that the birthday girl’s mom had lied about her — a lot. The other moms started apologizing. Then birthday girl’s dad and grandma apologized, too. Aurora and the birthday girl are still friends, even though birthday girl’s mom has notably not apologized. You win some, you lose some.